The other night I was with a group of friends at a bar. We had been there for a couple of hours drinking cocktails and a friend and me wanted to move to the next place to dance. When we were about to leave a friend of a friend arrived and that made everyone stay longer. I asked my friend if she wanted us to leave earlier and have the rest join us later and her response was “Isn’t that rude?”. What is supposed to be the correct and polite attitude from her triggered in me thoughts like “this doesn’t make sense to me, does it matter if it’s rude or not?, I don’t know if it is or not, it probably is, but I don’t care”.
I realize that all the rules and social norms that I have learned during my whole life are progressively starting to make less sense to me. This idea of having to do something you don’t want to so someone else feels respected and valued is starting to become harder to understand for me. This idea of abandoning yourself to do something you don’t want to because it is “correct” plus people feeling offended because they were “disrespected” when someone had no intention of hurting them makes everyone resented victims who put their wellbeing at anyone’s mercy and turns this world bananas.